A Letter to My Liver

Dear Lazy Liver,

Pull up a chair because we need to have a talk!!

First and foremost, I would like to say the following words are not filled with hate or anger.

They are oddly filled with gratitude and appreciation.

Most people would assume that this would not be the case because of the dynamic in which we currently exist is very toxic-literally!

Your lack of commitment to showing up 100% of the time has caused catastrophic damage in your wake.

However, I have learned much during that time.

Unlike that of a toxic relationship, there isn’t any place for me to go to find reprieve from your unrelenting taunting.

You have managed to find the sweet spot of living in your spoils and masking them as an “invisible illness”.

But, we have reached the point where it can no longer go without saying “YOU.HAVE.TO. GO!”

See, Lazy Liver, countless hours of appointments, careful adjustments, lifestyle changes, and so much more have gone into giving you a chance of survival with me.

You failed to take them every time they were offered.

In fact, you have looked each opportunity in the face and decided to do the opposite.

Taking them as an excuse to slow down even more and become more toxic at each turn.

Last week was the final straw!!!

I became subject to your final assaults upon my life!!

You attempted to pull me into the abyss of permanent laziness with you.

Resulting in 2 units of plasma, 2 bags of blood, surgery (which came with its own complication), morphine, and 3 days of literally fighting for my life when my blood pressure dropped so low it couldn’t be brought back up on its own.

So, start packing your bags because the troops have been activated!

The prayer warriors have rallied (and continue to do so), the pleas for newness and renewing have been made, and timelines have sped up to get you moving.

I fully expect you to not appreciate this news. To be angry, contemplative, and potentially find the energy to put your best effort of peak functionality into play for a little bit.

But, we both know you don’t have the genuine commitment to sustain it, so let’s make a pact here and now.

I will treat you as I always have, with the utmost care and you will quietly make an exit with divinity and grace! Newness is coming, because you have picked the wrong person to bring down with you.

I will never stop fighting, and if you and I are both honest, you will lose!

So let’s say our goodbyes now, and agree to coexist until all of your things are packed and moved out.

Thank you for the 33 years of lessons.

For, teaching me just how strong and resilient I am, for creating moments of deeper faith, stronger relationships, and awakening the champion that was inside of me all along!